Archive for June, 2007

just get an electric guitar and take some time – learn how to play

Friday, June 22nd, 2007

What are your dreams? Did you ever have them? When did you give up? How old were you then? 4? 12? 15? 21? Was it hard to forget?Or maybe you are one of those people who went for that and just started doing what you loved? Maybe you were born in your suit or in your sandals and you are fine?

After 4 days of being fucking professional, all dressed up and stressed up today something just broke inside me. The emotionless bubble crashed. Going to work on a tram I read about nurses striking against the government. Not wanting much – just a decent life. And the prime minister saying they will not get anything. And police moving them away of a street to a sidewalk. And then a quote of a representative of miners saying something like ‘We will not let to hurt the girls. Police used force against them. We are coming to defend them. They can face us we are not afraid.’ Then I just broke. Emotionally.

It sucks that in this country people working for years don’t have a decent life. And it is said that after 20 years after gaining democracy people still have to strike to be heard. And just as then the government is sending police to turn them down.

Then I thought how lucky I am being able to afford so much. Not thinking how much is a candy when buying it, etc. Most of the people in Poland aren’t that lucky.

Then at work I went to HRs to pick up some documents. And this colleague (lady in her 40s) told me that soon she’ll not be working here anymore. After years of working in HR in this company she is quiting and moving to Canada. Not for money – for her passion which is clinical psychology. And she told me that she was doing that part time in a hospital in Poland, but she was paid so little that it almost was a charity job. So she’s moving there to study it more and live of it. I was so amazed. She shown some emotions in this emotionless environment. And then we talked about seeking for opportunities, emigration, life. Amazing.

Next time you call my country a low cost country think about people fighting for a decent life. And I am sorry for not driving an Audi or a BMW and not owning a race motorbike as you do.

But… still I think that you can go for your dreams and achieve what you want. This will be a bumpy road but don’t give up. Ironically you are even in a better position. Owning nothing you have nothing to loose. Starting from nothing you will appreciate more what you gain and achieve. That’s why we – Polish people – will conquer the world one day. And the Polish-Chinese border will come true. Unless you are lazy and you give up. :-) It’s always up to you.

i would be good even if I got the thumbs down

Thursday, June 21st, 2007

It’s been a terribly tiring week. Haven’t got such a brain killing experience ever. So much time in our lives we lose for what we don’t want to do and things that are not important at all. But at least I had a nice view.

Nights are bright in Sweden. Tomorrow they have mid-summer celebrations. But I am back to Poland, so this year – no fun. :-)

What doesn’t Kill You Makes You Stronger

Saturday, June 16th, 2007

On a plane today I was sitting in the back. There was a little Asian girl sitting in the row behind mine on the other side. She could be 10. With a small lufthansa plastic bag with documents she was sitting there by a window. She must had had a long way behind. She didn’t look ok. She was sitting straight, pale on her face and she was shaking. Next to her there was a guy in a suit 32, and a woman, same age, also on a business travel. So the little girl was obviously not ok. She looked as she was extremely cold or scared or excited or about to throw up… Don’t know. But obviously she was not fine. The guy noticed that but did not help. The same with a the lady (but she had an excuse that she was sitting too far). I just couldn’t look at this. Stopped the stewardess. Excuse me, but I think that this kid needs some attention… She went there asked in English if everything was ok (more the people next to her than the girl), asked to take a look at her during the landing, said thank you to me and went away. Very helpful – 15 seconds of an illusion of we-care. Bullshit. Just 20 more minutes of the little girl’s shaking and we landed. Nobody did anything. But we landed and everything was fine. No victims, she didn’t throw up.

I wish she was sitting next to me. We would listen to a music from iPod, look at some photos, or just go through a newspaper. And maybe she would grown up for a little more different person – more helpful, more caring, more open. But no – this is a tough world baby and you have make it on your own.I am sick of this emotionless world.

I know we’ve all had a bumpy ride (I’m secretly on your side)

Thursday, June 14th, 2007

Chcę tylko wejść w sandałach do strumyka gdzieś w dalekim kraju i chodzić. Nie mieć problemów, myśleć, uśmiechać się. Mieć proste życie, tam gdzie życie jest proste. Być bliżej natury i codziennie się nią zachwycać. Moje będą palmy i zachody słońca. I nic nie będzie na opak.

update (English translation):

I just wanna walk into a stream wearing sandals in a country far, far away. Have no problems, think, smile. Have a simple life where life is simple. Be closer to nature and admire it every day. Palms will be mine and sunsets will be mine. And everything will be on its place.

anywhere but in between

Wednesday, June 13th, 2007

Weekend in Brussels:

For you, I’d give up all I own and move to a communist country

Friday, June 8th, 2007

Biurową ciszę zagłusza dźwięk telefonu. Niespodziewana moc melodii sprawia, że wszyscy Kollegen odrywają wzrok od monitorów i oczami szukają posiadacza telefonu z tak niespotykanym dzwonkiem. Uśmiechaja się, bo to miła odmienność od codziennej rutyny i wszechobecnych standardowych ustawień. A ja uśmiecham się do nich. Jeszcze chwila, gdy zerkam na wyświetlacz kto dzwoni i odbieram krótkim “Siema”. Kollegen wracają do pracy nieświadomi, że ta fajna melodia, która tak bardzo im się podobała, to pierwsze takty Stawki większej niż życie.

Spent a week working in Waldorf and staying in Oberflockenbach. At first it felt like vacation… Countryside, fresh air, nice weather, big bed, room with a balcony. Big Salsa Party in Heidelberg on Wednesday. But after a week of spending too much time with 2 Hungarians and 1 Polish I feel like I need more privacy. But finally – the weekend has landed. Since I am not coming back to Poland for a weekend I had to arrange my time here in Germany. Just in case took my palm with GPS maybe to visit around. So I started planning and checking how far it is to some cities around. Chose HOME, calculating…, 450 km, 4 hours.

Hey Nacho, what are you doing this weekend? Are you in Brussels, can you sleep me over? I will be coming with a friend. What kind of party? Garden party, barbecue… Awesome! I’ll be there.

Hey Aurelie! You bitch, you never pick up! I am coming to Brussels for a weekend. Just to let you know. I hope to see you! Ciao!

So the story continues… Brussels again.